I’ve started and re-started this post about a half-dozen times (if I’m being honest…9 times since May 22nd). It’s pretty obvious that I haven’t been blogging as much lately, and whenever I get out of the routine it’s hard to find the words to start again. And I wonder if I even have anything interesting or useful to say these days. I know not every post needs to be “earth-shattering” or even have a real point – so let’s just jump right in with this week’s “Thinking Out Loud!” link-up.
If there’s one word to describe how I’ve been lately, it’s UNDERWHELMED. Not what you were expecting? Most people these days are overwhelmed, for sure, with life, health, fitness, travel, work, you name it! But I’ve been feeling like I’m treading water without really moving forward. Don’t get me wrong — things aren’t bad and I’m not unhappy. In fact, in many ways my life is fuller than ever. But I still find myself struggling to adapt to a new “normal”, to figure out a routine, and find myself again.
Work has been interesting, to say the least. I’m in a new position…in a new function…in a new location. The first three months of the job were literally reading manuals and exploring the intranet to “get grounded in my function.” But as you may have noticed throughout the life of this blog (and if you know me personally), I have better focus and determination and results when I have a goal. So I went to my supervisor and told her that I would like a project, or series of small assignments, in order to feel like I am contributing. Things have certainly picked up since that conversation and my project queue is getting more and more fun…but as it’s a new role that I am responsible for defining…the pace is still a bit slow for me. I love problem-solving…and creative solutions…and helping people…and making “tech-speak” fun for “normal” people to understand.
Running has taken a backseat lately. You don’t need to hear my excuses, since that’s pretty much all they are, but for someone who was so excited to get back into training again, I’m a bit ashamed to admit that there hasn’t been much of it lately. I’m not sure exactly where the breakdown occurred… I had an AMAZING, STELLAR, PERSONAL RECORD run at the 2013 Gulf Coast Half Marathon in October. November was mid-mileage, since we had a scheduled race the first week of December. But that race was canceled, and I found myself not running…for a full two months. I eased back into things in February, had some pretty awesome runs a couple of months ago, and even managed a short, speedy run where I got my pace down to numbers I haven’t seen in forever. I finally felt like myself again. I was back!
And then I ran the Calgary Half Marathon on June 1st…and was absolutely humbled by it. 11 days later, we took a cross-country vacation. And I didn’t run for 12 days. And then it was Stampede for10 days in July. And I didn’t run for another 12 days. I tried setting some running goals in June and July, but I can tell my heart’s just not in it right now. I’ve actually been seriously craving some cross-training – looking into cycling and barre and yoga classes…considering a bootcamp…completing stair workouts with co-workers. I guess if I had to put it into words, I’d say I’m feeling that I need a group setting – something to hold me accountable…something to look forward to…something where I can see/feel some tangible results in 30 days.
More recently, as in…this week, I’ve been researching for the perfectly timed fall half marathon in British Columbia (BC) so that the hubby and I can take a mini vacation (in the form of a destination race, of course!) It is likely going to be Vancouver…but I think once we find the race, sign-up, and book the hotel and flight…then my running spirit will find its way back to me.
Life in the North is a bit different from in the South…and life in Canada, in general, is a bit different from life in the US. But there are still certain topics that no matter where you live you feel like you have to explain. What’s on my mind? Maybe I want a baby. Maybe I don’t. But I certainly don’t want the pitying looks after I answer the myriad of questions leading up to the inevitable questions: am I married (yes!), and how long I’ve been married (7 years!), and how old am I (in my 30’s!), and…still no baby (nope!), and do we want kids? And the cycle repeats. How in the world do people who can’t have children take on this barrage of personal questioning?!?!
On the flip side – I’ve been doing SO MUCH exploring…in Calgary…and in Canada. Our Anniversary Vacation to St. John’s, Newfoundland this year was absolutely one of the THE BEST trips we have ever done. And when our friends came to visit during Stampede, we got to explore some pretty cool local places AND play with Dinosaur bones in Drumheller! I’ve made a couple of good friends here over the last six months, and it’s really helped me out socially/emotionally while the hubby has been super busy the last couple of months. Thankfully this part of his job will slow back down in August and he can go back to normal working hours!!!
I’ve also eaten at some truly amazing places lately: UNA Pizza & Wine (#10 on TripAdvisor), The River Cafe (#19), Red’s Diner (#20), Rouge Restaurant (#50), Cucina (#77), and Mercato (#99)!
What’s on YOUR mind?